Creekside Church Sermon of June 4, 2000 "Faithful Friends " Ecclesiasticus 6:5-17	Rev. David Bibbee
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Notice that God did not say, "It's not advisable for man to be alone," or "It's not practical or convenient for man to be alone." God said it is not GOOD. Everything God had created to this point, Genesis says was very good, but not Adam without Eve. Eve wasn't provided for company for Adam, nor had she come to just provide companionship. It was not good for Adam to be solitary. He was meant to be complete. And to this end God created within Adam, and God has created within each of us a craving for relationship.

America was settled by adventurous people called Pioneers. In the early years of this nation, our government encouraged westward expansion by giving away quarter sections of land to homesteaders. Upon their arrival, the homesteaders task was to build a home. They usually built it in the center of their quarter plot, so they could feel pride from looking in all directions at land that was theirs. But they also discovered an old truth. It is not good for people to be alone. Photographs taken during this period show stressed, depressed, haunted looking people. It didn't take long for the homesteading families to move to the corners; to live close to three other families with whom they could share their lives.

"No person is an island," the old verse goes. Those who live an island existence avoid the misunderstandings and the messiness of maintaining friendships. They discover that freedom from others becomes a sentence in the prison of self. To remain solitary is not a serene life. It is a shrunken life.

Our faith presses this truth upon us as Christians. We were created as relational beings. We hunger to be connected with something beyond self. We know, when we are thinking most clearly and honestly, that nothing and no one can ultimately be counted upon, save God. In the end, God is all there is. But it is not just our need of God. God needs friends, too. God can't be a friend to himself. We want him to be with us. But is also true that God wants us to be with him.

In Exodus and again in Isaiah, the Bible says that Moses and Abraham spoke with God as a friend. That we can have a friendship with the creator of the cosmos is too fantastic to conceive, but not through the eyes of faith. But even among those who believe and worship and serve God, friendship only with God does not seem to be enough. Yet God gives us a gift of grace. God has not only created us for himself, but also for each other. The intimate bonds of friendship we share with one another are an indication of the intimacy that God feels for each of us.

There is a treasure trove of wisdom in a barely read portion of scripture called Ecclesiasticus, or, The Wisdom of Jesus, the Son of Sirach. It's in the portion of scripture called the Apocrypha, a collection of 14 books that were placed between the Old and New Testaments. Chapter six speaks of true and false friends. "Gain friends by testing," it says. "Don't trust hastily. Some are friends when it suits. They sit at your table, but won't stand by you in trouble. When you prosper, they are at your side. If you are brought low, they hide. Keep away from enemies, and be on guard with your friends."

As I read this I thought about the tale of a half frozen bird a farmer found in his barnyard. The temperature was near zero. The farmer pitied the poor bird and wasn't sure what to do. He then saw a fresh, steaming cow pie. He pushed the little bird into the manure. In just a little while the warmth brought it back to life. The bird felt so good and so grateful it broke into song. The farmer smiled. But just then the barnyard cat heard the singing, pulled the bird out of the pile and ate it. The moral is this: "Not everyone who puts you in it is your enemy, and not everyone who pulls you out is your friend."

"Whoever finds a faithful friend has found a treasure." Ecclesiasticus says. "Faithful friends are life-giving medicine, and those who fear the Lord will find them. Those who fear the Lord keep their friendships in repair, for they treat their neighbors as themselves." As I meditated upon these words, it occurred to me that the closer I feel to my friends, the closer I also feel to God.

As I worked on this sermon, I got a call from my best friend. He called for no reason in particular. One of those "just because" calls. Vaughn and I have shared a lot of life together...36 years to be exact. We went to the same school together. We played music together. We got in trouble together. We were best men in each other's weddings. I conducted his father's funeral. He spoke at my father's funeral. No one can make me laugh like Vaughn. He tells me the truth, even when it hurts. We have been mad at each other. We have forgiven one another. Now we look back and see how God was at work in us for the other when we needed the other most. I know just what the author of Ecclesiasticus means when he says, "Faithful friends are life-giving medicine."

To be healthy and whole requires the elixir of faithful friends who are always there, who accept us both for who we are and in spite of who we are; who allow us to be ourselves and with whom we can share the deepest secrets of our lives. Jesus is that sort of friend. He was not just a legend who inspires. He is a companion with whom we can connect. "Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?" Yet as primary as our relationship with Jesus is, it has conditions attached to it.

"You are my friends," he said. "if you do what I command. If you love one another as I have loved you." Scripture says, "The fear or awe of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom." But it is also the beginning of friendship. We have something to share with each other which God has shared with us. Our text says those who fear the Lord keep their friendships in repair. Friendships that matter most take time and effort to nurture. It usually is not the big things which break up a marriage or dissolve a friendship. It's the neglect of the little things...the grease that lubricates the wheels of relationship...little things like making time to be together; making a call, sending a card, or telling someone, "I appreciate you," "I love you." It's letting another know, though they know already, that they matter to you.

Faithful friends are a treasure from God that reflect the depth of intimacy God has for us. This was impressed upon me the week I just spent in the Taizé community in France. In 1940, Brother Roger formed a community of Protestant and Catholic brothers who dedicated themselves to prayer, peace, and reconciliation among the people the world had torn asunder. Every year tens of thousands of young people flock to Taizé, not just to experience the beautiful worship and music, but to encounter God and discover new meaning for their lives.

When I arrived, I didn't know what to expect. At first it was extremely disorienting to be surrounded by people from so many countries and cultures speaking many languages I did not understand. But strangers I could not understand at the beginning of the week became friends I could understand at week's end. At 10 a.m. each morning, Brother Hun Yol, a Taizé brother from Korea who was fluent in seven languages led a Bible study on John 21. Afterward we met in international study groups where we discussed questions posed by Brother Hun.

I was in a French English group comprised of two American pastors and two professors, a Mennonite social worker from Holland named Tischka, Sister Chizelle, a nun from Belgium, Lorenze, a doctor's wife from Belgium, Mikel, a middle aged French man who had spent the past two years visiting religious communities in India and Europe, and our facilitator Genevieve, a delightful Catholic woman who was mayor of a town in France. She had been coming to Taizé with her husband every year since they were 29...forty years ago. As the week went by we shared deeply with one another about life and faith. Sometimes we had to work hard getting through the language barrier, but the result was rewarding.

A moment I want to share with you happened in worship. At Taizé, each Friday is Good Friday. Saturday night is the Easter Vigil. Sunday morning celebrates the resurrection. The final act of Good Friday worship is when the brothers carry an icon cross of Jesus to the center of the sanctuary, lay it on the floor, and place candles on it at the head and hands. People then begin streaming to the cross. They form a circle around it, kneeling in prayer, touching their foreheads to the cross. 200 + people were around it, and one by one they slip into the inner circle to pray.

It was a moving moment as a thousand people sang, "My soul is at rest from God alone; my salvation comes from God." After 20 minutes of watching, I made my way to the cross thinking about my daughter. The day before I had shared with my group about the turmoil she and we have gone through. "I feel emotionally numb," I had told them. "My tears have been cried dry," I said. I rested my forehead upon the cross. After maybe a minute, I felt two arms across my back. I turned my head left and right to see who it was. It was Genevieve, the mayor and her husband Jean Paul.

In that moment something happened. It felt as if I was melting. The religious philosopher William James used words like "numinous" and "ineffable" to describe an experience words cannot describe. It was as if for one brief second I could feel the pain of God for his son and the pain I feel for my daughter, and I did what I hadn't done in months. I cried. A little later I stood and looked into the smiling faces of that beautiful French couple who all week had pronounced my name Da-veed, and I saw something as clearly as I do now. I saw Christ in the beaming eyes of Genevieve and Jean Paul. In a moment of absolute clarity I saw beyond theology, denomination, perspectives about scripture, and the flimsy fence we put around Jesus to keep others out. I saw not just a facet of faith, but I saw its essence. I was struck by the realization...this is what it's all about!

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