OPENING --
Poor Charlie Brown

I imagine that is how the apostles felt. They were still hoping that yesterday would be better.

The disciples are locked in a room -- hidden away suffering from fear and doubt - filled with anxiety over the events of the past week. So many things have changed and now they are holed up in this room.

They locked the doors and met in secrecy. The authorities were furious to hear the news that the tomb was empty. There was no telling what they might do next. They killed Jesus right in the middle of Passover feast. It seemed they would stop at nothing in order to eliminate Jesus, his teachings and maybe even his followers.

The scripture is split up. The disciples minus Thomas are in the room and it is not until a week later that Thomas and Jesus meet. Is he really all that different from the other disciples? Let's think back to the Easter story. Mary went to the tomb and it was empty, so she ran back and told Peter and John. Did they immediately believe her? No, they went to the tomb to see for themselves. It isn't until they go inside and see the cloth and the linens lying empty in the tomb that they believe. What is it that they believe, though? That Jesus has risen? No.

Even Mary, when Jesus appears to her directly, does not recognize him at first. And even after she does recognize him, she goes back and tells the disciples, but we are given no indication that they do anything about it. In fact, in the other gospels, it tells us that they did not believe what she told them. As Luke puts it, "These words seemed to them an idle tale, and they did not believe them." (Luke 24:11)

Easter Sunday biggest sign act of them all -- John called miracle signs that pointed to God and all of them doubted -- all of them had fear and hopelessness.

MOVE 1 -- FEAR AND DOUBT
That isn’t unusual to face fear and doubt given the crisis the disciples find themselves in.

Jesus was gone and their lives were at risk -- this was real.

Some things scare us so much it takes our breath away.
Some things leave us in such despair -- we question God’s presence -- God’s faithfulness.

We may suffer a crisis of faith.
We might doubt and fear if we are like some people who have been unemployed for a long time. We are doubting God’s provision for us.

We may have doubts and fears if we have made wrong choices away from God’s best interest and we doubt God’s faithfulness.

We might have despair in the long-time illness of our spouses. We doubt’s God’s presence in the midst.

I remember reading an article in the Truth concerning pastors’ doubts about God.

Some said they were agnostic, not sure about God and others’ flat out did not believe any longer

Maybe they have seen too many things to believe. When we begin to have doubts and fears -- we begin to have a crisis of faith.

SIGNS ILLUSTRATION
It reminds me of the movie Signs. Are any of you familiar with it? It’s an odd movie.

It is a sci-fi movie starring Mel Gibson.

Mel Gibson plays the part of Graham Hess a former Episcopal priest whose wife was killed in a violent car accident. The sheriff calls Graham and tells him his wife is pinned between the two cars and the sheriff tells him when they move the cars Graham’s wife will die.

He has an opportunity to speak to her before she dies. She gives him words of encouragement for their family. They have two children and Graham’s brother who is a former minor league ball player.

He is a man suffering grief and despair and doubting God’s existence.

Aliens are inhabiting their town and one is on the farm. At first Graham doesn’t believe they are aliens, he thinks they are pranksters but as the movie progresses, he begins to see and fear them.

As the tension builds, Graham’s doubt of God’s existence is revealed in conversation with his brother and then with the children.

Conversation

During a talk with Merrill, Graham’s brother, Graham dismisses his brother's belief in signs and miracles, all evidence of some higher power, and says that they will have to face whatever is threatening them alone.

Morgan: Maybe we should say a prayer.
Graham Hess: No.
Morgan: Why not?
Graham Hess: We're not saying a prayer.
Morgan: Bo has a bad feeling.
Bo: I had a dream.
Graham Hess: We aren't saying a prayer. Eat!
Morgan: I hate you.
Graham Hess: That's fine.
Morgan: You let Mom die.
Merrill: Morgan...
Graham Hess: I am not wasting one more minute of my life on prayer. Not one more minute. Understood?
His faith was in crisis. He did not believe in God.

Graham Hess threatens the existence of the alien when he cuts off his fingers.

And the alien comes after the Graham Hess’ son receives a breath of death from the alien and the son lays unconscious as a battle ensues.

Graham realizes events in his life were fated for this moment, as he finds meaning in his wife's final words. During the battle, the words of his wife came back to him and each were words of salvation in the alien battle. Each word was a directive to save his family.
They kill the alien, Graham Hess picks up his son carries him outside and lays him on the ground and he begins to plead for the life of his son. The son awakes.

TRANSITION
BUT GOD DID NOT LEAVE HIM IN THIS PLACE.

Months later, with his faith restored, Graham gets dressed in his clerical garb and goes back to church.

MOVE 2 -- JESUS GIVES US ROOM IN OUR DOUBTS AND FEARS

God doesn’t leave us that way.
God is in the midst

Jesus enters today in the midst of their fear and doubt and brings peace to their anxiety.

Like this painting.

[SHOW PAINTING - Caravaggio]

Caravaggio has captured the face of Jesus and the others with keen observation of scripture - Jesus in his care and compassion and the humanity of the disciples and their astonishment.

God doesn’t leave us in this place of doubt or despair.

God moves in the midst of our fears and doubts about all kinds of things --

Death and illness -- provision in our unemployment -- change in the midst

He doesn’t come condemning them for not believing -- shows them in his care and compassion

Jesus offers himself when he comes with peace and his presence in comfort and truth.
No questions asked.

TRANSITION

It is Ok to go through the same things as the disciples -- it is Ok to question and doubt -- it is OK

In our doubts and fears, the grace increases.

Thomas did not believe the other disciples. "If Jesus were alive, why are you all hiding behind locked doors?" I think that this is what Thomas might have thought. The “true believers” seemed to have no faith at all!

We all suffer from fear and doubt -- we all have moments of despair.

Jesus

Never condemning came to them to chase away doubt and to restore faith.

It is important for us to know this:

MOVE 3 -- OUR MARKS OF FAITH
It is important for us to know
Because these experiences of crisis of faith -- of doubt and despair.
Is important to our growth -- our relationship with God.

All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Jesus teaches the disciples about God -- they are learning. We are learning.

It is OK to struggle in our faith.

Struggle is a part of the believing

ILLUSTRATION - STRUGGLING
Once long ago a group of pastors went on a spiritual retreat led by a rather remarkable nun. They had times to meditate and pray and times when they all gathered and she spoke about various things. At one point that weekend, they had an assigned period when they could speak with their leader privately. In one pastor’s meeting, she said an insightful thing for someone who had only known the pastor for a little while. "Keep struggling," she said as the pastor walked out the door. "It's your way of being close to God."

Wrestle and grow stronger -- keep struggling --it signifies our closeness and our relationship with God. It is our way of staying close to God.

Our faith develops into a faith that isn’t a wishy- washy faith -- not one that has been spoon-fed -- deep faith not one on the surface. Not one that recites creeds without thought but one that wants to know -- a faith-seeking God.

Thomas proclaims , “My Lord and my God.” He moved from doubt and fear to devotion.

OUR MARKS AND JESUS’MARKS
These experiences become our marks of faith.

JESUS’ MARKS OF FAITH

Jesus’ marks -- Jesus shows them his marks -- we show others our marks --

Become our testimonies -- Become a testimony of a resurrected Christ.

It is important to know that sharing our doubts and fears is a good thing.

MOVE 4 -- BUILDS COMMUNITUY

ILLUSTRATION
Merrill: There are a lot of things I can take, and some things I can't. But what I can't take is when my older brother, who's everything that I want to be, starts losing faith in things. I saw that look in your eyes last night. I don't ever want to see that look in your eyes again.

It is not easy to share these -- it is not easy for people to see our weakness.

FEAR
We can’t be afraid to say to our church family. It is what builds our body of Christ.

Afraid to tell anyone -- makes it worse -- if we tell we might seem weak. We might seem not a true Christian.

We have to be able to trust our church family.

Without any risk of disappointing someone -- as Graham’s brother does.
When we do this without any risk of shame or guilt
Our church becomes authentic -- real -- honest
We have a sense of unity -- the Psalmist today says
Unity in the church is like - 2It is like the precious oil on the head, running down upon the beard, on the beard of Aaron, running down over the collar of his robes.
3It is like the dew of Hermon, which falls on the mountains of Zion. For there the Lord ordained his blessing, life forevermore.

We build unity when we testify to our marks of faith.

Our Marks of Faith defines ours as we seek God in our own struggles.